I'm suppose to summarize medieval Eucharistic theology in 400 words. This is like pulling teeth (apologies to Swambo).

I just finished watching Battlestar Galactica. I feel rather sick and disgusted.

St. Patrick's Day

Ireland and Catholicism are to many people irrevocably linked. Culture and religion riding in the same cart is a powerful, in fact near unstoppable force (Herbert, Dune).

Years ago my Great-Great-Grandfather Price disowned his daughter for daring to marry a French-Canadian Catholic. He didn't even go to church. In my Dad's family he is unsurprisingly remembered as a mean-spirited man.

Today I'm wearing orange, mainly just because I have a new shirt, partly as a joke, and also to remember my history. Grandpa Price raised his daughter to hate Catholics. She married one anyways. History must be remembered (both good and bad), but most importantly, we must learn from it.

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Lichens!

1. Lichens will often glow under UV light!
2. A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find lichens.
3. It takes more than 500 peanuts to make lichens!
4. If your ear itches, this means that someone is talking about lichens.
5. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are lichens.
6. Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by lichens fighting underground!
7. There are six towns named lichens in the United States.
8. The first toy product ever advertised on television was Mr Lichens Head.
9. Forty percent of the world's almonds and twenty percent of the world's peanuts are used in the manufacture of lichens.
10. While performing her duties as queen, Cleopatra sometimes dressed up as lichens!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Calculus!

1. The number one cause of blindness in the United States is calculus!
2. American Airlines saved forty thousand dollars a year by eliminating calculus from each salad served in first class.
3. Calculus, from the movie of the same name, had green blood.
4. While performing her duties as queen, Cleopatra sometimes dressed up as calculus.
5. Marie Antoinette never said 'let them eat cake' - this is a mistranslation of 'let them eat calculus'!
6. In Japan, calculus can only be prepared by chefs specially trained and certified by the government!
7. It is bad luck to walk under calculus.
8. The eye of an ostrich is bigger than calculus.
9. All of the roles in Shakespeare's plays - including the female roles - were originally played by calculus.
10. Calculus once lost a Dolly Parton lookalike contest.

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

This Is Not Helping My Anxiety Problem

I was hoping to find out whether or not I have a summer job today. Unfortunately, what I found out is that it's completely up in the air. Back in January I asked Doug (one of the profs in the department) if I could have my job from last summer back. I had already missed the NSERC deadline, which wouldn't normally be a problem, except that Doug's group is up for grant renewal and they have no idea how much money they're going to get. Hence they can't pay summer students out-of-pocket.

Doug then applied for a grant under the USTEP program, and today I found out that he did get one. Unfortunately, he only got one, and I'm not the only person who wants a job (there are two of us). I was thinking that these grants work like the NSERC's where I get paid the money directly, in which case the fact that my marks are very good would have ensured that I get one. However, in the USTEP program the professor is given the money to hire who he pleases. So, if the other person is still interested in the job then Doug's going to decide who gets it my flipping a coin.

Therefore, I have need of a probability-altering device. Also, if I do get my old job back, I promise not to complain about it all the time.

Smashing

Article 25. You'd better watch your driving,

because it might crash the ship. And then

you're buggered--wait, that's article 29.

"Care shall be taken in the conducting and

steering of any of His Majesty's ships, that

through willfulness, negligence, or other

defaults, no ship be stranded, or run upon

any rocks or sands, or split or hazarded,

upon pain, that such as shall be found guilty

therein, be punished by death, or such other

punishment, as the offence by a court martial

shall be judged to deserve."


Why would you be executed in Nelson's Navy?
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Comfy Bum

I'm wearing sweatpants to school. I should know better than to do this. I'm incapable of doing serious work while wearing sweatpants, they're just too comfortable.

I Live

. . . and I will wreck havoc upon these Normans! I am a patient Saxon. I will wait until another disgruntled noble comes looking for a hired butcher. Then I will once again swing this mace and plunge my dagger into warm flesh.

Defeat!

The valiant struggles of the knights are not in vain, for in his arrogance my lord Ragnarok fails to guard himself against the simplest of attacks.

There is naught left to do but drag his dead corpse from the hall in run back into the countryside.

A Crash of Shields

This barbarian is really more a simple peasant than a fighter. However, I was not afraid to test the wood of my shield against a certain long-haired knight.

Enter the Ravenous Horde

The fighting is gruesome, for the barbarians have never heard of honour, or civilized combat. They howl like rabid dogs and laugh at the pain of those they maim and slaughter.

Battle Most Foul. . .

The Lady Alice is more than capable of defending herself.

For God and King!

When the newly crowned king declares that all nobles will donate lands to the people, Sir Ragnarok the Proud, head of the king's army, is outraged. He insults our Saracen guest and then denounces the king himself. His follow knights cast him out.

Not to be so easily spurned, Sir Ragnarok rides far and wide to gain a ravenous horde of barbarians, to whom he promises the lands of any they kill, outcast Highlanders, Saxons, and even Norsemen.

They storm the castle and break into the great hall as the knights receive a blessing before combat.

The Duel

An offense to the Lady Alice results in a matter of honour. Only steel can provide justice here.

A belly dancer brought by our visitor from the east, Prince Ali

The New King & Queen

Medieval Feast Pictures!

This year's STMSU Medieval Feast focused on stage drama (not historical accuracy). In this, it was an amazing success. King Michael the First, newly crowned monarch by right of conquest, treated those gathered to delicious food. After drinking down a cup of potato soup and dipping bread into butter, every group of four or five people received their own tray piled high with exotic vegetables such as steamed broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, and baby potatoes. The meat dish was ribs and a whole roasted chicken.

Unexpected, but very cool

What Witch Hunter Robin Character Are You?


Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.

I Knew It

What Gundam SEED Character Are You?


Hosted by theOtaku.com: Anime. Done right.

Said in my house today:

1. "Who was that guy who started all those wars in Europe?"
"Napoleon?"
"No. He started all these wars and they went exactly how he wanted them to go. His name is a doughnut."
"Bismarck?"
"That's him."

2. "We're not related. We were separated at birth." - My sister, younger by five years

Stanley

Imagine that the characters are speaking with British accents

Stan had small, beady eyes with a very vacant look to them. Judging by his rapid, jerky, head movements, he also had Tourette’s syndrome. These features were generally overlooked, however, by anyone admiring his lovely (though slightly dirty) white plumage.

Woman: “Why shouldn’t I call him Stan?”
Man: “It’s a chicken and we’re going to eat it.”
Woman: “Well he is a male chicken isn’t he? Anyhow, I suppose we need to slaughter him.”
Man: “Right, you hold him down and I’ll get a knife.”
Woman: “You’re just going to go and chop Stan’s head off? And I’m supposed to hold him?”
Man: “Yes”
Woman: “What if Stanley panics and bites me?”
Man: “Panics!”
Woman: “Yes, panics. Little Stanley’s going to see you coming at him with a great big knife.”
Man: “He won’t know what it’s for.”
Woman: “You think he doesn’t know! Little Stanley’s arteries getting severed, his gracious little heart spraying out my little Stany-Poo’s blood all over the clean grass!”
Man: “It’s a bird, woman, not your grandson. Stop calling it Stanley!”
Woman: “But it’s a nice name.”
Man: “AAAaaah!”
Woman: “Well, he certainly doesn’t look like a Harry, and I can’t abide Jack, it’s so utterly common.”
Man: “It’s a chicken! Call him, it, The Chicken!”
Woman: “Fine then.”
Man: “Now, if you don’t want to chop its head off how are we going to kill it?”
Woman: “Well, maybe you could snap his neck. Just one quick little twist, my Chicky-Poo wouldn’t have to suffer that way.”
Man: “Chicky-Poo?”
Woman: “It’s always best to end a relationship quickly, no nasty business later then.”
Man: “And just how will this chicken do something nasty when he’s dead?!”
Woman: “Well, he might give us Salmonella.”
Man: “Enough of this.”

The man grabs the chicken after a brief wrestling match, during which the woman is decidedly in the chicken’s favour.

Man: “Why are you rooting for him?”
Woman: “I can’t help it, I always feel sorry for the underdog.”
Man: “It’s. . . A . . . Chicken!!!” (The man simultaneously waves the chicken in the woman’s face)

The woman breaks down crying.

Woman: “I know! I know! It’s just he reminds me of my Great-Uncle Beatrice.”
Man: “I thought we agreed not to speak of him.”
Woman: “I never said that!”
Man: “I’ve had quite enough of this! I’m going to kill this chicken right now!”

The man begins to kill the chicken.

Woman: “You monster! You odious, filthy, murderous scamp! You viscously greedy little arthropod! You contemptuous, malevolent, nefarious, skinny little Ned!”
Man: “Alright mum! Alright!”
Woman: “Don’t you call me mum!”
Woman: “Is it dead?”
Man: “Yes, I’m sorry, what do you want me do about it?”
Woman: “Teriyaki or lemon pepper?”
Man: “What?”
Woman: “I said, Teriyaki or lemon pepper?”
Man: “Oh. Lemon pepper, please.”
Woman: “Right then.”

The woman walks off while the man begins plucking the chicken.

I've recently discovered that the public library has a collection of the soundtracks from various musicals. So far, I've been listening to Aida, Ragtime, and a collection of varying Bernstein works set in New York. I would really love to see Ragtime. The breadth of emotion expressed in the music is absolutely amazing, as is its ability to convey the ideas and struggles of an era.